


While We Were Hunting Rabbits

by Warp5Complex_Archivist



Category: Star Trek: Enterprise
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-04-19
Updated: 2006-04-19
Packaged: 2018-08-16 04:02:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8086330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Warp5Complex_Archivist/pseuds/Warp5Complex_Archivist
Summary: Malcolm wakes up in his quarters.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Kylie Lee, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Warp 5 Complex](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Warp_5_Complex), the software of which ceased to be maintained and created a security hazard. To make future maintenance and archive growth easier, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but I may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Warp 5 Complex collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/Warp5Complex).

  
Author's notes: Spoilers: 4.15 "Affliction"  
  
What is up with me and the bizarre stories lately? I donâ€™t know. This is just something short I wrote while experiencing writerâ€™s block for my term paper on Bobby Kennedy. Thanks to Matthew Good.  


* * *

> While we were hunting rabbits  
> I came upon a clear  
> The sky its stars like fortune drilled me  
> Until now I was a soldier  
> Until now I dealt in fear  
> These years of cloak and dagger  
> Have left us disappeared
> 
> -Matthew Good, "While We Were Hunting Rabbits"

**1\. Spring**

Malcolm scrambles. 

His feet slip in the mud, his hands grasp at the roots of trees, trying desperately to hang on as rain pours down, hair plastered to his face. The ground explodes next to him, a blast hitting near his left hand, a muddy bomb blasting into his face. He falls back and jumps up again. Donâ€™t stop, never stop. 

At twenty-one, Malcolm is all knees and elbows and sharp angles and bone. At twenty-one, Malcolm is older than he should be. At twenty-one, Malcolm is shadows and knives and bleak gray. 

He grabs out and snatches a root. There is mud underneath his fingernails. He claws for a hold. He risks a glance and thereâ€™s another explosion. He slips again. 

Malcolm wakes up in his quarters, breathing harshly. 

At thirty-five, he still feels twenty-one. 

* * *

**2\. Summer**

Malcolm is in an old, broken room. Sun filters in through a dusty window. Thereâ€™s a pain in his arm and some in his chest. He canâ€™t feel his legs. 

A young woman comes in, long red hair in a braid. She has freckles on her face and bright green eyes. She looks Irish. She puts a tray on the bedside table and sits beside him. She puts a hand on his forehead and thereâ€™s something soft in her pretty eyes. 

She doesnâ€™t say a word, only running her hand along his face. Itâ€™s a touch and it feels niceâ€”nice because itâ€™s soft, nice because itâ€™s human, nice because itâ€™s from a pretty girl, nice because he can feel it and it isnâ€™t pain. She threads her fingers in his. 

He still has dirt under his nails. 

Without a word, she leans down and presses her lips against his. Itâ€™s soft and warm and it isnâ€™t pain and he could just die like this, with this girl whose name he canâ€™t remember. Who was she to him? 

Malcolm wakes up in his quarters, without the girl. 

Her name was Kathleen, he thinks. 

* * *

**3\. Autumn**

There are days when Malcolm cannot remember who he is. He thinks he is an invisible man, an unreal man, a soldier in the army of darkness. He had a heart of darknessâ€”but then he remembered Kathleen and the ring on his finger and the falling leaves, and itâ€™s not so hard anymore. 

Itâ€™s insane, what he does. Cloak and dagger, mystery man. He cannot even tell Kathleen what he does. 

A bullet cuts into his flesh and he apologizes to Kathleen as she screams. 

He should have told her. If only he could have. If only, if only, if onlyâ€¦ 

Kathleen is dying in the corner, bleeding out. The enemies had come and destroyed Malcolmâ€™s life, all because of them. Malcolm crawls over and holds her hand as she dies. He vows never to work for them again. He vows to go into something safe. He vows never to feel again. 

Malcolm wakes up in his quarters, his hand empty. 

His heart is broken and beating loudly. 

* * *

**4\. Winter**

He isnâ€™t invited to the funeral. Itâ€™s understandable: Kathleenâ€™s family hates him for what he brought against their beautiful, baby daughter. Malcolm hates himself. 

So the day of the funeral, Malcolm applies for a position on the Enterprise and he hopes he gets it, so he can get out of the world of cloak and daggers, so he just doesnâ€™t have to feel again. That would be nice, not feeling. He wonâ€™t have to remember what happened to Kathleen and the baby and why everything is all his fault. 

It starts to snow the day of the funeral, while Malcolm is walking around the town. Kathleen loved the snow and their little child was supposed to be born in January. It is then that he decides to hate snow and every living being. Hate is easier than love. 

Malcolm wakes up in his quarters, when only yesterday he was in the brig. 

In space, it doesnâ€™t snow. In space, itâ€™s easier. 


End file.
